at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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