I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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