sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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