Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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