and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
