After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
