32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
