and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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