whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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