And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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