Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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