Non-Jews are for practice
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
