He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
