Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
