I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
