Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
