he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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