i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize