Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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