Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
