All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
