I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
