i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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