i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
