So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
