UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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