Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
