I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize