My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
