their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
