I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
