peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
