we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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