If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
