Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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