My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize