I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize