I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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