So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
