Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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