i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
