I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize