i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
