i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
