that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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