another moral hangover. fuck.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
