lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
