Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
a search helicopter?!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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