Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
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