He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
