i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
